I as in...

I did a transfer and needed the other pharmacy's DEA#, the pharmacist said
"It's B, I as in... Igor..."

Gauged

So, I delivered drugs to a hospice for patients with alzheimer's today. The nurse that took the meds was very handsome, though very pierced, gauged, and tattooed. If I had alzheimers, I think I would be very afraid of him... like, every time I saw him for the rest of my life...

Klonopin

"Why is this prescription for 1-3 Lexapro a day?"
"As needed anti-depressants?"
"I thought that was what lorazepam is for"
"No, it's Klonopin, because the tablet tells you everything is O...K..."

injection site reaction

While in a group shadowing a professor, we began to chat with a patient who was beginning interferon gamma treatment at our clinic. When my professor asked the woman about her injection site reactions, the woman totally dropped her pants in front of all of us and said "do you mean this?" "Yes, that would be an injection site reaction, thank you."

best exam question

Props to the Heff for the best test question for this round

Which of the following is not a side affect of Xenical?
a. increased stool volume
b. flatus with discharge
c. oily stool
d. desire to eat high fat foods
e. fecal incontinence

And people take this drug, why?

where do i put this?

I was putting away the order at a pharmacy I was new to and was having issues getting generic drugs in the right order on the shelf because this store shelved things by brand. I held up a box of anucort suppositories and asked a tech "where do I put this?" Without skipping a beat she replied, "up your rectum."

diabetic shoes

There was a woman who was chillin' in our store front for a while, and I wasn't quite sure if she was waiting for help or a med or what, so I turned to ask her if I could help. She was looking at our diabetic shoes display and asked "Will you give me a pair of shoes because I'm diabetic?" "No," I said, "but you can order them from us." "Oh," she said, "because that pair of Mary Janes is really cute." She then walked out of the store.

malfunctional meter

A very grumpy man walked into my pharmacy just as it opened on a Saturday exclaiming that his glucometer wasn't working. The pharmacist handed it to me and the other intern and it took as an hour, and about 6 test strips, to find out what value his test solution should read and to actually perform the test. The test was golden. 47mg/dl and the solution was supposed to read between 31-61. The man wasn't satisfied. I asked him about his medication history, his diet, any lifestyle changes etc., etc., etc. The pharmacist then came up and asked him the same questions. We couldn't placate him, he just got more and more upset, so I said "look, my blood sugar is always under a hundred, can I test myself on your meter?" I lanced myself and tested right in front of him and got 90gm/dl. After about an hour and a half of my time, he finally accepted the fact that his meter is working and his doc will need to bump up his metformin a little.